Christmas is almost here....

And with it all the end of year events....

Sometimes... Tonight was Connors kindy concert. Something we had been preparing for. Social stories and lots of encouragement, but we were not getting much excitement from him about it. 

His teacher pulled me aside one afternoon for a chat about the concert. Firstly she stated that he loved the practising. He responds well to music and dance, but understood if I did not bring him. I was taken aback a bit but said we would be there, even though we were to be in Toowoomba for his medical appointment. She also let us know that he would be placed on one end in case I saw a need to remove him. 

After much inner debate I decided the trip to Toowoomba would be cancelled so he did not have to contend with the trip on the day of the concert. 

So the evening arrives and off to the concert we go.....

Once dressed and all 3 kiddies are in the car, Connor demands his transformers which were left on the table... During the short trip we had tears and drama. Hitting his baby sister. No consoling him. By the time we got there I was ready to go home. :(. But decided to persevere. This concert was important. Even if he did not recognise it. 

So we arrive. Bub in the pram, older sis waiting by pram, grandma also waiting patiently. Next... Connor. As he was getting out of the car I noticed he had wet himself. Wtf??? Has not done this in a year or more!! So leaving the others we return home to get changed, and to pick up the transformers. 

Return trip to the school. "Park now". "No Connor it's concert time. You and xxx and xxxx can sing songs for the parents tonight". "No. Park I tell you". So we hop out of the car and head into the hall. He sees the other kids and starts playing. All might be ok....

The kiddies are all lined up and sitting so beautifully, and as promised, Connor was on the end. He sat so quietly during the "reflection" song. And then the performances started. The first few songs he did not really participate in.  My heart went out for him.  His angry face was on. I started to tear up at how lost and angry and frustrated he looks. 

Until I realised he could not see the prompting teacher at the back if the hall. So big sis, who was also videoing, started doing the actions. too. He could see her and started to join in. It was going to be ok. He started enjoying himself. He smiled. That awesome heart melting smile. It was going to be all ok. 

This gave me a chance to check out the other kids. It was a kiddie concert after all. A few were misbehaving. One needed a parent with them. It made me wonder if the "special needs" of my son were not needs of very child. All need to be guided, loved and fears need to be overcome!!!

I was so very proud of my boy. He did so well in the end. When his name was called out for his "records" he proudly strutted up to receive his pile. He is growing up so fast it is scaring me. I fear so much for his future sometimes. Will the guidance we and his educators be enough?

Well we have just one more Christmas event left to go. I hope, since this time WILL be in the park, things might go a bit smoother from the start....

And in case I don't blog against before Christmas, I would like to wish all of you a safe and joyous time. 

Thank you for your support and joining me in this journey....

Ps. Sorry re the quality of the photos. Cropped from the awesome videos big sis took of the night. I did not, for privacy issues, want to show other children's faces. :)